Before You Begin: Remember, this is a triggering topic for a lot of people. Thinking about your death can bring up memories of the loss of loved ones, fears about what you’d leave behind, or other emotionally complex pain points. That’s totally normal so just take it slow. – Sarah
Planning for the end of your life is not about expecting the worst. It’s about giving your loved ones clarity, comfort, and peace of mind when they will need it most. This guide will help you understand the key elements of a solid end-of-life plan and how to get started.
If a child or loved one sent this to you, just know it’s nobody’s favorite subject. For some of us, the unknown adds extra fear to an already scary stage of life. For others, spending anytime on the topic of death feels like a hurdle they cannot get over. Our best advice is to be communicative with language like, “Thanks for prioritizing this, I don’t want to add any stress to you but this is an emotional topic for me, too. I’ll look at it this week and we can plan to discuss in a few days.”
1. Legal Documents
These are the foundation of your plan. You don’t need to be wealthy to have them, and having them in place can prevent confusion and conflict later.
- Will: Outlines how your assets should be distributed and who will care for any dependents.
- Living Will: Describes your wishes for medical treatment if you can’t speak for yourself.
- Healthcare Proxy (or Medical Power of Attorney): Appoints someone to make medical decisions on your behalf.
- Financial Power of Attorney: Allows someone to handle your finances if you’re unable to.
Tip: Let someone you trust know where to find these documents.
2. Medical Preferences
Write down your values about medical care. These questions can help:
- Do you want all measures taken to prolong life, or do you prefer comfort care?
- Would you want to be on a ventilator or feeding tube long-term?
- Who should speak for you if you cannot?
Include a list of medications, doctors, and allergies. Update this as needed.
3. Funeral or Memorial Wishes
You don’t need to plan every detail, but sharing your preferences can be a huge gift to those left behind.
- Burial or cremation?
- Formal funeral or casual gathering?
- Any songs, readings, or people you’d want included?
- Do you want to prepay or set aside funds?
You can write your wishes in a simple document labeled “Memorial Preferences.”
4. Digital and Financial Info
Your loved ones will likely need access to:
- Bank accounts and retirement info
- Life insurance policies
- Safe deposit boxes or storage units
- Login credentials for important online accounts
You can use a password manager or leave a sealed list in a safe place. Make sure someone knows how to access it.
5. Letters or Messages
Consider writing letters to your children, partner, or friends. You can also record videos or voice memos. These do not have to be perfect. They are a chance to say the things that matter most.
6. Centralize It All
Once everything is gathered, choose one place to store your plan. This could be a folder labeled “In Case of Emergency” or a secure digital vault. Tell your healthcare proxy or next of kin where to find it.
Restfully offers planning templates and checklists to help you get started, along with digital tools to keep everything in one place.
Final Thought
Getting your end-of-life plan organized is an act of love. It reduces stress, prevents arguments, and gives your family the clarity they’ll need in a hard moment. Start with one step. Then keep going.
You do not have to do it all at once. But you do deserve the peace that comes from being prepared. If you are going to speak to your children or loved ones about this, we recommend this post for some communication suggestions.
